I'm agnostic which means I believe in a higher power but I wouldn't call it God necessarily. There's got to be something that makes things happen, right? Like we're just a very large video game and someone has a WII remote making us drive or decide to call a friend. I was not raised in a religious family and this is just the belief I took on. My mom was baptized Mormon if you can believe that but obviously is not practicing! My sister is religious when it's beneficial for her but I've never known her to go to church or pray.
I have attended several churches in my life. They were all Christian churches (I think). Nothing has ever gotten through though. I think it would be awesome to believe in God and believe that there's really something up there looking out for you but it's just too unbelievable for me. I'm more of a tangible person. If I can't touch it or see it for that matter then it's hard for me to believe in something. It's got to be comforting to feel like you always have something on your side. To me there's just no proof that God ever existed besides stories. Does this mean I should believe in bears that live in trees and talk too?
What holds me back the most I think is the fact that all the horrible things happen in the world. Children die of diseases before they've even lived, women are violently raped, people kill other people, and all kinds of other horrific events. If there such a person that can control everything on this earth then why not make it so these terrible things don't happen?? I've asked this question to a religious person before and their answer was that "without suffering we can't fully live". Not sure how I feel about that. I'm pretty sure I could live a pretty full life without being raped.
I don't have many friends that are religious but I don't treat the ones that are any different just because they believe in God. Everyone should be treated equally, right? There are so many religious people I have noticed who do not act like this. As if I'm such a horrible person just because I don't praise God. Shouldn't all of "Gods people" treat everyone kindly unless they do them wrong? Maybe I just have a skewed perception of how a religious person should act though.
Even though it's doubtful I'll change my views in my next thirty years I'm still open to the idea. If something happened that made me a believer then so be it.
*Katie and I 2010
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